


AmazingPhil and the Horrifying Motion Sickness Experience

by dizzy



Series: road trip mix tape 2016 (aka, the tour fics) [4]
Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Established Relationship, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-30
Updated: 2016-05-30
Packaged: 2018-07-11 04:49:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,296
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7029277
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dizzy/pseuds/dizzy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Based on this tweet (and subsequent liveshow explanation. Thanks, Dan!):</p><p>@AmazingPhil<br/>Harry Potter and the Forbidden Journey? More like Harry Potter and the HORRIFYING MOTION SICKNESS BARF EXPERIENCE</p>
            </blockquote>





	AmazingPhil and the Horrifying Motion Sickness Experience

Tequila was a mistake. He only had two drinks but it's rolling around in his insides now multiplying the discomfort. 

The Harry Potter ride was a mistake. Fun, in theory, but definitely a mistake. 

Leaving the flat in London was a mistake. Who needs to tour anyway?

"Give me a one to ten," Dan says, leaning in close. 

If all Phil's attention weren't directed elsewhere, he'd probably have shoved Dan away. Not just because they're in a theme park full of vlogging youtubers, but because right now the idea of anyone touching him is repulsive. 

"Eight," he says. "Point five." 

Dan winces. Anything above an eight means a bed and a cool towel, stat, or the worst case scenario is almost unavoidable. 

There are no beds or cool towels to be found around here, just loud music and air that makes his skin clammy. 

"Cat," Dan calls out. He starts to stop while talking to her but Phil keeps going. Concentrating on one foot in front of the other, that's the only way he can do it. He only stops when Dan calls out, "Phil, come back. We're gonna find someone and ask the quickest way out, that sounds good?" 

Phil nods. "Yeah." 

*

"Ugh." Phil groans. 

Cat sighs sympathetically. "I know. I feel awful too. I mean, I took like five-" 

She keeps talking. 

Phil picks up his phone and tweets something mindless. He and Dan talked about posting a picture from the park, but the last thing he wants is the entire internet to see his face right now. Dan can do one of the ride photos if he really wants. 

Cat is still talking. 

Phil is still not listening. 

It's nothing against her, really. She's a good friend and he usually enjoys their time together. 

It's just that he doesn't have the energy to be sympathetic to her right now. He doesn't have energy for anything except getting somewhere that he can lay down, or at least where it'll be less humiliating if he loses this fight with queasiness. 

"Right, Phil?" Cat asks, jarring him out of his focus. 

He answers with a weak, "Yeah," then looks back down at his phone. It's a mistake. Suddenly the screen is too bright and his stomach lurches. He clicks it off abruptly and puts the phone in his pocket. 

Cat is giving him a confused look. Apparently _yeah_ was not a good response. Phil shoots Dan a helpless look. 

Dan gets it right away, because he's Dan, and that's how they operate. "Hey look, there's a security guard." 

*

Phil leans on Dan while Dan talks to the security guard. 

Dan's arm goes around him, rubbing up and down over his back. Does Dan even realize he's doing it?

Cat is watching them. Phil catches her eye and she looks away. He doesn't really blame her. She spent a weekend in their flat and this still might be the most physical contact between them she's ever seen.

He just can't bring himself to care right now. 

*

Dan convinces Cat to go back and meet up with some more friends. 

She's reluctant. She says she can get him some water. She can call someone. 

(Who? Who would she even call?) 

"We'll just go back to the bus," Dan says. 

"Are you sure?" She asks. Her voice is stuffy and congested. 

"Yeah," Phil says, nodding. "We'll catch up in Los Angeles." 

She gives them both a quick squeeze goodbye then walks off already typing out a message to someone else on her phone. 

*

Everything is too loud and too bright. The music is cranked up, the lights strobing. 

Phil's breathing shallowly now. This is almost certainly a losing battle at this point but he'll hold strong as long as he can. Maybe he can last out until they get to the hotel, maybe-

At least the park isn't full, Phil tells himself. If worst comes to worst he can at least probably find somewhere with no one watching him. 

*

They're just past the Cat in the Hat when the minion waddles up. He dances in Phil's path and the park employee with him shouts out a happy greeting and an offer to take a picture. 

Phil is sure he goes green, because suddenly Dan looks very alarmed and intervenes. 

"Sorry, mate," Dan says. "Maybe next time." 

A retch crawls up the back of Phil's throat. He swallows hard to keep it down. "Dan, I need to-" 

Dan gets the urgency with half a sentence. Phil's not even really paying attention to after that, just following behind Dan. 

Relief thrums alongside nausea when he realizes Dan's found the toilets for them. 

*

Porcelain under Phil's fingertips has never felt like such a relief. 

"Phil?" Dan calls out. 

He's on the other side of the stall. Phil made him swear to stay there. It's humiliating enough that Dan's even in the toilets with him, but he wouldn't stay wait outside.

Phil answers in a low moan because he thinks when he opens his mouth, it won't be words coming out. 

He's right. His stomach rolls and his fingers clench the top of the tank and- 

Well, no descriptors needed, really. 

* 

Dan's a filthy liar who ends up not kneeling next to Phil but standing behind him, which is almost as bad. "I don't think the first bus is heading back for at least an hour. I'll call a taxi for us to get back to the hotel as soon as you think you can make it without, you know-" 

"Dan." Phil says, which is code for _stop talking_ and _I can't think about that right now_. 

He thinks he's probably done but his stomach still feels rebellious and now his mouth tastes awful and he's sweaty and disgusting and it doesn't matter how many times he has to go through this, it's still the worst feeling ever every time. 

Phil leans back, eyes closed. He feels Dan closer behind him and turns his head, resting his cheek against Dan's thigh. Dan's hand comes down to the top of his head, fingers pushing his fringe back neatly. 

"We'll get a taxi," Dan says. 

* 

"I feel better, I promise," Phil says. "We could even stay if you want. We could find Cat again." 

He doesn't really want to at all. Dan's bought him a Sprite to drink and he isn't sure he really needs it anymore but it clears the gross taste out of his mouth at least. 

"We're going back to the hotel." Dan's decisive. "It's not that much of a loss, not like we can't just go again next year. Or any time we want. Now drink that." 

"Seriously, I feel okay," Phil tries to insist. 

Dan can tell he's lying. He doesn't feel sick anymore but he feels tired and all really wants to do is find a bed and crawl into it and maybe make Dan cuddle him some. 

"Yeah, you do right now, but we're about to get into another vehicle." Dan gives him a dubious look. 

Phil blanches and then sips the drink. "Good point." 

* 

Bed is ten kinds of bliss after the fastest shower in the world. Phil doesn't bother doing anything to his hair or putting clothes on, just crawls between the sheets and tries to will his body into instant slumber. 

Besides him, Dan snickers. 

"What?" Phil mumbles. His eyes are so heavy. This pillow is so nice. 

"You almost sicked on a Minion." 

"I hate you." Phil groans and turns over so he's facing away from Dan. "Don't ever talk to me again." 

Dan leans over and kisses his shoulder, then turns the light out. The last thing Phil hears before he actually falls asleep is Dan giggling and whispering, _"On a Minion, though."_


End file.
